


Broken bones and broken mind

by Rottenfawn



Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Animal Death, Asexual Character, Cannibalism, Character Study, Childhood Trauma, Murder, Random & Short, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-21
Updated: 2020-04-24
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:08:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23768239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rottenfawn/pseuds/Rottenfawn
Summary: A collection of moments from Alastor's human life. Short and sweet.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 25





	1. Taste

Once Alastor got a taste of what he had always dreamed of, he knew there was no way for him to go back.  
This bittersweet realization came paired with the sickening feeling of sheer euphoria, that he had a clear sight on his personality and what he wanted to be in life.  
The fog that had always surrounded his mind, thick and immitigable, gave space to a rather bright future.  
It wasn't like he was glad to be the beast he always thought he was, but that he now could live it out, knowing that there was no use repressing and keeping it caged anyway.  
This path would only lead to an unfulfilled existence marked with the boredom of day-to-day life.  
No, the brunette wanted something else, something different.

Human meat could be prepared in many different forms.  
Alastor cherished the variations he could choose from and how each one of them had their own distinguishable trademark.  
He preferred the meat to be fresh, raw, and still soaked with blood. The metallic taste united with the heartiness was excellent.  
But also chopped into little pieces and stored in his refrigerator to devour it over the next days was favorable.  
Still, nothing compared to a flavorful meal right from the source, even when the blood might stain his clothes way too often for his liking.


	2. Safe

There was nothing more valuable than a mother's love.   
This was one of the beliefs Alastor was holding through his life and until his death.  
He knew there were poor fools who didn't have the privilege of having a loving mother figure by their side, no source of warmth and safety to return to, and that he could call himself a fortunate man.  
The brunette had never been an easy child, with his emotional distance and the worry he brought upon his mother as he didn't make any friends, becoming a loner who didn't need anyone but himself and her.   
Still, she never failed to make him feel loved and secure.

Maybe, Alastor had to admit that she was a little too focused on keeping him safe and sound.  
It was true that his body wasn't made for adventures and the dangers the world had to offer to those who were willing to explore them.  
At an early age already, his pale skin formed bruises way too quickly, and his bones sometimes made sounds they shouldn't do at this stage of life.  
It didn't take long until it was clear that he was different than the other people who surrounded him; he was chronically ill.

Alastor had been an intelligent child, loud and ready to speak his mind on any given possibility, conquering the looks of pity other's gave him when he struggled with a bright and cheeky smile.  
He never stopped smiling, not even when he was hurt.  
His mother's emotional wellbeing depended on it because whenever his expression threatened to change, there was sadness in her eyes, he couldn't live with.  
He learned that taking risks would make her cry but that staying inside, cooking and cleaning and educating himself was filling her heart with joy.  
While he enjoyed the time they were spending together, he couldn't help but stare out of the window now and then and ask himself, how it would be to feel excited, to experience the unknown and the thrill of being on the verge of death.  
But her hugs and kind words made him listen, obey and stay inside, days passing by as he grew older.

The way he felt when she died was indescribable.  
Even in front of her grave, he kept his smile on his face, but it never reached his eyes.  
They shared the same color, hazel and warm, no matter how cold the world was.  
The tulips Alastor brought were only a sign of never-ending love he felt for his mother. With her leaving this place, nothing was holding him down anymore.  
He didn't have to be cautious about not getting hurt and taking proper care of himself.   
Now it was time to let the beast out and allow it to ruin him.  
After all, he deserved it for not being able to save the only person that's worth saving.


End file.
